Sometimes i do wonder, am i happy here? In my own home.

Yes, i do have what i want, which majority of people envy,

 But i am not really happy.

What i really want, i can never get it. 

Knowing that i get everything in the past, but now? 

You are letting a rotten apple in, spoiling the r/s between us..

And i no longer get the 1st position anymore. 

It hurts so badly, 

No one understand. 

I cant choose my family, i only can accept the facts now.

I have never been receiving any happiness since young,

The only i get are trauma and cries accumulated from young.

And now, even my uncle is more concerned about my health than you,
He even told u about you and u don't even care.
Perhaps i shouldnt come to this world in the first place,
Even if i leave now, i guess u will get over soon.
Oh well im just an useless person.

 And Yes, you gave me all i wanted in term of physical items, 

But that's not the actual thing i want.

Oh well, you guys will never understand that.  

Define Happiness.

I just wish to have a complete family.

Impossible.

as what I have seen, it has been 3 months since I updated this dead blog!

Laziness strikes me.

Today is TGIF? or I can say it's quite a relaxing day for me.

Oh well, shall have a short update of my latest event which is my..

21st Birthday celebration!

Well first time organising such a big celebration, with all my beloved friends and relatives tto celebrate with me.

There are happy moments as well as some unhappy moments which I don't want to further elaborate.
Simply have fun on that day only :)

 

Perhaps I should let things go easy to make our life better and easier.

Everyone should just do what they like and shouldn't believe in others so easily, even your loved ones. It will only hurt you even more so you have learn to be even hard-hearted and stay to yourself!

Everyone must learn to be independent and im trying hard to do so,

there are lots of role-model outside, single pretty lady!

Just wanna enjoy my life that's all!

Shall train hard for my run!

Looking forward to tmr morning 27km!!
If possible, im going to sign up for MR25 for end of yr and need to complete minimum of 5 rounds within 12hrs!
(1round = 10.5km)

Seems pretty hard to me as it is a trail marathon, still dun have the courage to join as im afraid of rolling down the muddy forest.

Oh well, there's always the first time!

Running makes me happy even though it comes with all the abrasions and injuries and scars!

Next up,

I also signed as DanceSports as my new cca, hope I will enjoy the time there!
Dance & Run are my company in life !!

 

 

Lovely,

Joy:)

 

Can you spot 2 of the 4 legged lizards?

 

It was my 1st adventure run in Macritchie Reservoir with my shifu!

It lasted for an hour plus and it was real tiring with all the slopes and the branches!
But it was worth it, with all the fun and the scenery that I thought that it's hard to find in Singapore!
It was a simply pleasure to run on Monday's morning!

Yesterday, Thursday's evening, it was my 2nd training in town, jogged from UOB building to Garden by the Bays and back! It was motivating and depressing for me to know that I am the lousiest of all as the group  are going for 100km marathon while I am just a beginner.

But I shall make them as my motivation & work toward it!

Running has become a passion to me!

Looking forward to this Saturday's morning MR run!

 

Lovely,

Joy:)



There's no place for me to say out my thoughts at all except in this blog and not much people know about it so I guess this is the only place for me to vent all my feelings out.


Woke up feeling happy because my weight dropped again however, happy moment don't last at all. when I am as usual having my breakfast and Mom came over to tell me a piece of bad news which was Dad wants to marry his Vietnam gf again.

Why I said 'again' is because last year he almost go register the marriage, but I talked it out and he told my Kuching aunt that he will only bring up the issue after I got married. But now, it's just all lies.

This time round, I am really sick & tired of everything, all these nonsenses causing me to be unhappy all the time. If it's going to happen, I will just going to tell him that I am sick of tired, living at home will cause me to be unhappy since I will have to face her everyday which I dislike in fact, after they marry, I will dislike even more & hate her eventually.

No point staying together anymore, perhaps I will find a room to rent & find a job outside.

But it's expensive to rent a room in Sg.
Hais.

 pretty yea?

 look at my dark circles & eye bag!

 back to my balcony cabin!

I don't know why I am feeling famished while watching the sunset and endured all the way till 8am before I went for breakfast buffet by myself!
Well, seems unbelievable right?

But I don't really feel sad or what having breakfast by myself anymore,

in fact quite peaceful though.

My Saturday afternoon is spent at the port klang shopping mall, as usual,

had ramen & Xiao long bao lunch and 2 hours massage!

The after effect was lots of bruises on my body! Oh well..

 

Back to cruise,

Sunset !
Love it!



It has been 2 months since I blogged partly due to laziness and nothing much to update.

Been leading a dull life though, other than sleep, eat & work, nothing else.

 

On this special day, 1st June 2013, I did an achievement whereby I don't even have the confidence to complete it but oh well, I did it :)

 

 Firstly, Happy 21st Birthday to WeeSien!
Had birthday BBQ session at The Estuary condo till 10.15pm and quickly left since I am going to be late for my Sundown 2013 marathon! Rush home to get ready and here I go to F1 Pit!

The whole 42km was a virgin experience for me as I couldn't believe I did it.

I didn't stop running/jogging till 30km where I can no longer feel the leg of mine and walked for about 800m before I endure the soreness and pain again. In my mind, I want to achieve this goal of mine and after applying Tiger Balm gel, the numbness allowed me to push myself further! In the end, I crossed the finisher line in 5hr 36min 29sec!

I walked for about 3-4km for the whole journey. My next goal is to train myself to run/jog the whole full marathon without stopping & to improve my timing of course!
Though it wasn't as good as other runner but I had this sense of achievement and satisfaction which motivated to go for more full marathons next time!

 

Cheers!!

I have found a passion in my life, which is to run and enjoy the scenic view!:)

Looking forward to the next marathon!

 

 

Lovely,

Joy:)





 We had a cup of blackforest ice blended while praying for the rain to stop and he kept on ensuring me that we will get to play today as the rain is stopping.

To our delight, it stopped :) 

BUT, it was drizzling again which making us indecisive to buy the single ticket or annual ticket, luckily we bought the single ticket because after the few hours, it seems nothing much.

 Cheers to no rain!

Here we start our adventure plans :D

 :))

 fatty pig! 

 love this!

 act one muscular! 

 spot the mini him! 

 We played a full 3hours till they are closed for the day at 6pm!

Everyone were rushing to the Washroom but luckily we had a room in Hard Rock Hotel so we don't really have to wash up, just have to dry ourself and proceed to check-in with his mom's presence.

 Pretty decor! 

 A board prepared fully by him! 

Simply love this, in my opinion i think that it is quite thoughtful for a guy to do it as normally only girl will do that! 

All the thoughtful moments prepared by him in the room .... :)

 even the wall above the bed oso have! 

 corridor, door & even bathroom! 

 the pantry area! 

Quite thoughtful right and meticulous right? :) 

Next up, dinner at Hard Rock Hotel ( we had this 1 year back after the USS trip!)

 reminiscing the past:) 

 Ordered the same main course of the 3 meats combo and 1 side dish but didn't expect to be an all meats feast dinner! I still love it! 

 My margarita and his.... (forgotten Opps)

 Just look at his face!!

Omg, weak max! 

I have to help him finish his drink! 

 How can a night end without gazing at the stars? 

(However, not much stars) :( 

That's the end of our pre-day 060413 simple celebrations!

Here we start our actual day celebrations^^

070413 <3 p="">